Having Heart
by ladylemonade4ever
Summary: Sophie's ordinary life has been disrupted by the handsome stranger she bumped into on May Day, she can't stop thinking about the Wizard Howl. Unfortunately that makes her an easy target for a vengeful Witch who is out for more than just her blood... can Sophie overcome the darkest creature she's ever faced? dark Book!verse


_A/N: I wrote this wanting to play with one of the more sinister aspects of the book… Not sure if this will be a multi-chaptered fic or not. Reviews are always appreciated. By the by, totally picture Book Sophie now as Merida from Brave. Both rockin' those crazy gorgeous red curls :3_

_Disclaimer: Do not own Howl's Moving Castle. If I did, the four doors would go to my house, New Orleans, somewhere in the woods, and London._

Having Heart

Sophie tromped into the hat shop tiredly, yanking out her mussed braid, teasing the red-gold strands loose with aching fingers. The day had been another frustration; she'd felt suffocated working in the backroom with such dull hats. She'd been restless all morning, a certain hyacinth-scented man jauntily paraded around her thoughts; she felt it impossible to keep working in the boring shop when she could be out there mingling with the crowds, possibly bumping into her wizard again…

She'd figured it out after distractedly ruminating over the events of Mayday for the better part of a week, guiltily trying to push the experience of pure exhilarating freedom to the back of her mind, knowing it wasn't her place as the eldest to have such adventures. To both her and Fanny's surprise, it had been necessary more than once for her stepmother to gently scold her for daydreaming too much and not making enough hats. Sophie would find herself arguing fiercely to the hats she'd already made, imagining them giving her a proper dressing down for entertaining thoughts of finding the wizard Howl and spending a day in his company. More than once she'd gone silent immediately upon the entry of one of the workers or Fanny, praying that none of them would wise up to her dangerous wishes. She couldn't bear the knowledge of having them pity her, whispering behind her back, "Poor dear, to think that that despicable Howl would ever be interested in her, she's not even pretty and being eldest! Her heart would surely be protected, that's certain."

She'd talked herself into collecting her hour break at lunch, telling Fanny that she realized she didn't need to take her midday meal at the shop, that it'd be good for her to get fresh air like the other shop girls. Fanny dismissed her without suspicion, not picking up on Sophie's nervous fidgeting with her dowdy straw hat. Sophie escaped the shop in a jog, heart racing as she determined she would look all over town to find him, having convinced herself that all she needed to do was to look at him once more and she's be able to return back to her normal life. She spent the entire break retracing the steps she took Mayday, feeling embarrassed for looking so plain and uninteresting, noticing that even in lesser crowds people overlooked her. _But Howl didn't_. _He'd picked her out of the crowd in an instant, when she was even trying on purpose not to be noticed_. She comforted herself with those thoughts as she frantically searched other parts of town, wishing she was braver to ask about him, trying to nonchalantly eavesdrop on conversations if she picked up the words "heartless" and "vile." It was with no such luck, and she reluctantly realized that she needed to return to the shop immediately as she was well over-due to return from her lunch-break.

And yet, what if her wizard moseyed on into town after she returned to the shop, could she afford to miss this chance? Like everyone else in Market Chipping, she knew he would pack up his castle and leave soon enough, what with the Wicked Witch of the Waste dogging his heels, something most of the citizens were grateful for. Seeing that dark blot half shrouded by mists up on the hill made them all nervous, Sophie included (at least before Mayday), especially with whispers of rumors that Howl liked to eat girls' hearts if they were pretty. An unofficial curfew was followed more or less by the townspeople and girls were advised to always walk about in pairs. It made for a rather irritating atmosphere in Market Chipping, at least for Sophie who heard the shop girls complain about it constantly, her sympathy waning as she just wished to the hat she was working on for the Witch to catch up with Howl already so everyone could shut up. Now as Sophie desperately searched out her wizard she fervently hoped that the Witch would at least wait to make an appearance until after she saw Howl.

Sophie had dawdled as long as she could in town, skipping out the rest of the work day to finish her quest, only to feel more and more stupid and defeated as the daylight hours disappeared. Fighting tears of disappointment and a sickening feeling of having to explain herself to Fanny in the morning, she walked dejectedly back to the shop, in synchronicity with the waning crowd returning to homes and shops because of curfew. She had half an urge to go see Martha at Cesari's and have her scold her for being so stupid, something her hats were unable to do, but as she passed by the fragrant bakery the thought of Martha's pitying expression suppressed that urge. An invisible storm cloud rained on Sophie's head as she berated herself for wasting a day over someone who was probably dangerous and she was so _stupid, stupid, stupid_! And, proof that somebody up there was laughing at her, just as Sophie approached the shop in weary relief at reaching home so that she could drown herself in the bathtub, a sudden gust of wind snatched her hat off her head. She ran after it a few hopeless steps but gave up as the wind gently carried the dowdy thing away over rooftops and out of sight.

Which left poor Sophie where this story began, in the hat shop disappointedly alone (no hat) and yanking out her braid in frustration.

Turning around to lock the door, she heavily trudged to go back behind the counter and out into the courtyard so that she could let herself into their living quarters, when she paused before the counter and caught a glimpse of herself in the large gilded mirror propped up above the doorway. Her reflection bothered something inside her, so badly that she found herself climbing on to the counter to get a better look so that she could identify what it was about her appearance that bothered her so much.

A pale, tired face wreathed in coppery hair that tumbled about all over the place stared back at her. The reflection frowned as she critically assessed her features, her frumpy grey dress dusty from the day's walking and limply hanging off her thin frame, the bulky boots that chafed at her calves if she didn't have socks, the scarred hands that constantly bled from pricking herself with pins. So plain and boring. And yet, with her hair down, though it wasn't really proper of course, but with her hair down she looked a little less… forgettable. _Really_, Sophie thought, _she wasn't ugly at all_. Definitely not as pretty as Lettie, or even Martha, but there was potential. After a hopeful moment she was kicking off her boots and shrugging out of her dress and relieving the strain from her corset by fumbling with the lacings and watched with satisfaction as the uncomfortable thing sailed across the room. Now only dressed in a simple cotton shift that almost reached her knees and with a modest neckline despite the thin straps, she took in her reflection again, only to be more upset. With her pale, skinny limbs and overabundant wrongly-colored hair and unsettlingly luminous eyes, she looked wild. Like one of those fae creatures men were supposed to be weary of. Not the demure, earthy beauties that her sisters were, who Howl would certainly be attracted to. Resignedly, she made to get off the counter when a flicker of movement in the mirror caught her eye. Squinting, she gasped as suddenly a woman dressed in black materialized out of thin air right in the doorway of her shop. Sophie startled so badly that she lost her footing as she whirled around and painfully pitched herself into the hard countertop, scattering rolls of fabric and sharp objects like pins and scissors.

As Sophie struggled to sit up on the counter, her body screaming in pain as she felt like her bones had smashed to pieces on impact and it seemed that a few pins here and there were stabbing her, the woman silently glided over the floor to stand directly in front of her. Sophie couldn't see her eyes as they were shaded by the brim of a menacing hat with a dead raven perched upon it, but the red-stained lips were visible enough as they curled into a malicious sneer. The woman, who Sophie realized with a dawning horror must be the Witch of the Waste, playfully rang the bell on the counter by Sophie's quivering foot.

"I know it's after hours, but I really am in need of your service," the Witch drawled.

"I-I- don't think I can assist you, m-maybe if you come back tomor-"

"THAT'S NOT GOOD ENOUGH," the Witch's thunderous voice rattled the room, causing hats to fall off their shelves and the chandelier above to dangerously swing.

Sophie lurched off the counter in a frenzied panic, stumbling in the direction of the hats scattered near the door, thinking fast, "Well I-I- guess I could maybe help you try on a few hats, it's spring and we've got a new collection!"

"Ah-ah-ah not so fast little mouse," the Witch appeared instantly in front of the door, making Sophie scramble backwards and fall stunned. As the Witch drew herself up Sophie grabbed the nearest hat, one that she had told merrily a year ago would face many battles, and attempted to shield herself with it.

The Witch throatily laughed as she attempted to hover closer over Sophie, only to be rebuffed by some invisible wall, "What's this? Magic? Tsk tsk, but you'll have to do better than that to keep ME away…" The Witch's eyes closed for a moment and then opened flashing, and with a shriek Sophie dropped the now flaming hat, leaping up with blistering hands extended out in pain. The Witch grabbed Sophie's shoulder in a vice grip, dragging the silently weeping girl back to the counter and roughly depositing her on the floor.

"I don't understand… Why are you _here_? What could you possibly want from a hat shop?" Sophie shuddered with fear as she looked up to the looming figure with the red slashed mouth. The Witch sighed in disgust and yanked Sophie up to eye level by her a voluminous hank of hair, causing her to cry out and feebly clutch at the source of pain.

"_What could you possibly want from a hat shop?_" The Witch mimicked acidly before continuing in a sinister whisper, her breath hot near Sophie's ear, "Stupid girl as if it wasn't OBVIOUS."

"F-fine! I'm stupid! I really don't know, please tell me I don't-"

"YOU HAVE ENSNARED THE HEART OF HOWL WITH YOUR WITCHCRAFT! _WHEN YOU HAD NO RIGHT!"_ The Witch's voice suddenly boomed with a force otherworldly and the whole shop responded with a groan, as the walls splintered from the shockwave, windows shattered and the door cracked. The chandelier that had been dangerously swinging in an eerie circle ripped through the ceiling, bringing dust and plaster crashing down. Sophie was flung backwards out of the Witch's grip and vaulted several feet high into the air. Her back smacked against the mirror, which due to its height had sustained no injury from the Witch's magic, only to shatter upon her impact. Sophie blacked out for a few blissful seconds, only to wake up with the Witch's cruel hand wrapped around her throat holding her aloft against the broken glass dripping with her blood. Sophie clawed at the Witch's finger in panic, gasping and unable to take in air as her bloody, glass-encrusted legs began to twitch in a dance similar to the one criminals knew as they hung.

The Witch watched impassively as Sophie struggled to choke out words past the crushing pressure against her straining neck, "Please, I- I can't breathe! I- can't- breathe!" Red dots swam at the edges of her darkening vision until with a sudden release of her throat Sophie plummeted to the floor along with the battered mirror, the mirror being further warped as it twisted under the sickening thud of Sophie's now prone body. The Witch gently floated down, her feet lightly landing on Sophie's hair, a slight crunch where the heel of her boot met with the multiple shards of glass tangled in it.

"I almost had him," the Witch spat, "I still will have him. I've laid the curse perfectly, there's no way his heart can escape me a second time. I still don't understand how you managed to bungle it up, there's barely any magic in you, you've practically stamped it all out yourself. You might have been a threat at one time, in different circumstances…" the Witch prattled on menacingly, oblivious as Sophie quietly stirred to consciousness, fingers groping around the floor for a shard of glass…

"Howl cannot get away, he and his demon will fall, I will make sure of it! Miss Angorian and I will not fail-" Sophie lunged up and plunged the jagged shard into her breast, stark white against the deep black of her bodice, grim determination in her wincing eyes as a trail of blood from her hairline stung them. She collapsed bodily against the stunned Witch who fell back against the counter, missing the sudden fury then hungered gleam that filled the Witch's eyes, instead of the death that normally would have glazed over them. Sophie gave a weary moan, rolling away from the Witch's trembling form in shock over her actions, burying her face into her knees. _I killed her. I killed the Witch of the Waste. And I, I almost died…but I have magic. I have magic. _She fixated on the thought of her magic, trying not to think about the dead body draped over the shop counter behind her, so absorbed that she didn't catch the rustling movement as the body stood up, brushing off dust from its black velvet dress. It was when a hand clasped over Sophie's shaking shoulder, the adrenalin wearing away and leaving Sophie in crippling amounts of pain, that she jerkily turned around to see the Witch slowly pull out the shard of mirror from her unbleeding breast and a manic grin alighting her features.

"You. You have such _heart._"

Sophie screamed.

_Reviews are gold._


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